


The Diamond Banquet

by Flygon_Master



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, F/F, Fluff, Holidays, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-31
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-10-01 07:46:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17240294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flygon_Master/pseuds/Flygon_Master
Summary: Oh, hell no. Lapis was not going on a blind date with Jasper’s super nerd friend! Especially not to such a boring ass party, on Christmas Eve no less!





	The Diamond Banquet

**_♪ It’s the most wonderful time of the year_ ** **_♪_ **

Lapis wasn’t sure if there was a ‘most wonderful’ time of the year, but if she had been forced to choose her personal favorite ‘time of the year’ the holiday season wouldn’t have been at the top of her list.

She held nothing really against the holidays themselves for the most part, although she did despise crowds and some of the more embarrassing traditions she was often forced to join in on…no her main dislike of this particular time of year was the freezing temperature and abundance of snow that they got here in Beach City.

Having been born and raised in Hawaii Lapis was accustom to warmth year round. Beach parties and surfing contests even during the so called winter months, so when her parents told her she would be moving to a coastal mainland city to attend college Lapis assumed little in her lifestyle would actually change.

Oh how wrong she had been.

Seeing snow on the beach for the first time had been a magical experience, however it quickly lost its charm once Lapis realized she was doomed to months of freezing weather every year. No more winter surf-offs or Christmas luaus…

That’s not to say there wasn’t plenty of other Christmas time festivities to partake in, no Lapis found out the hard way just how enthralled with the holiday season her new friends and self-dubbed surrogate family were.

To this day Lapis still wonders if living in the Universe house is a smart idea with how happy and exuberant they are **_all the damn time._**

_“Oh my gosh! Guys the snow is finally sticking, we need to build snowmen before it all melts! Amethyst go grab Lapis while me and Garnet get the shovels!”_

Lapis could still hear those dreaded words in her worst of nightmares: ‘Go grab Lapis’…it was enough to make the blunette shudder, after all it was practically a death sentence that she always accepted with a smile because it was for Steven.

Damn him and his innocent cuteness!

It wasn’t always his doing though, no there was an even bigger culprit when it came to forcing Lapis into wintertime activities…and what made it even worse was where Steven was innocent enough not to really understand the level of sway he had over Lapis, **_she_** fully knew the extent of her power and abused it daily throughout the holidays.

_”Everyone get your coats on! They just finished decorating town hall and everyone is gathering there to sing some Christmas carols! Oh, don’t worry honey I already grabbed your coat from your room for you!”_

Sweet, caring…and evil! That’s what Rose was, an evil mastermind that just somehow knew how to subvert all of Lapis’ escape tactics! As much as Lapis hated to it was possible to slip away from Steven, but Rose…Rose knew everything!

When Lapis was feeling down and just wanted to hide out in her room? Nope, Rose was there to take her out shopping for new ornaments for the tree. Lapis and Amethyst fighting with each other to the point where neither wants to see the other? Not happening in Rose’s house, it’s time for Christmas games in the family room!

Lapis had cried more times in front of Rose then she cared to count, but at the end of it all she loved how much they cared about her…even if they were a bunch of holiday obsessed lunatics.

That was why Lapis was currently so annoyed. Here she was sitting in a small hole-in-the-wall café, next to a freezing cold window, watching snowflakes lazily drift down from the sky…and why was she here instead of back in her nice warm room?

Was it because Steven insisted on going out in the snow? Was it because Rose thought it would be a good idea to fill up on some ‘Christmas cheer’? No, it was because Pearl wanted to go out! Why did Lapis care? Sure she liked Pearl well enough, when she wasn’t being an insufferable prick, but not enough to venture out into the cold and snow to make small talk at some random ass café!

She had to do this kind of thing enough as it was with both Steven and Rose hyped up on ‘holiday excitement’…nevertheless here she was, having been literally dragged from the house and forced across town by slightly older women who insisted on embarrassingly holding her hand the entire way to said shitty café…probably so she couldn’t run away…which was pretty smart Lapis had to admit.

Lapis glared at Pearl for what felt like the millionth time since she’d been evicted from her bedroom, only to receive yet another overly excited if not slightly embarrassed smile in return, causing Lapis to groan angrily as she buried her head in her arms that had been resting on the table in front of her.

“Okay P’ remind me again why your peppy ass dragged us out and about?” Amethyst drawled, exasperation clearly evident in her voice although not quite to the level that Lapis was at.

They couldn’t really be blamed for feeling annoyed either as Pearl had practically sprung upon them while they were lounging in Lapis’ room and forced them out of the house with no warning, excitedly chatting their ears off the entire time. Only for them to end up at this small downtown café so Pearl could squeakily bounce up and down in her seat and giggle every few seconds like a giddy school girl waiting for her crush to show up.

Which was more or less true, but that certainly didn’t fully explain the situation…

“I told Jasper months ago that I wanted to go to the Diamond Banquet on Christmas Eve for my gift, which shouldn’t be too hard for her since she does work for _the_ Yellow Diamond after all!” Pearl bragged with a small smirk, puffing out her chest slightly in pride despite knowing that Lapis and Amethyst were already well aware of Jasper employment status.

Truth be told Lapis had never thought of Jaspers employment situation as something to be proud of when the two of them were still together, in fact it was often the catalyst for many of the pairs long winded fights. Pearl seemed to love it though, that her girlfriend was somebody ‘important’ who worked for the Diamonds.

Lapis couldn’t give less of a shit…

“I got a few texts from her earlier saying she had a big Christmas surprise for me and to meet her here after she got off work.” Pearl was practically glowing with joy as she spoke and it was a good thing Lapis had hidden away in her arms because simply listening to how happy Pearl sounded was enough of a drag, she didn’t need to be blinded as well.

“Okay, I followed you there the first time you told us…but why the hell are we here? Can’t you see you are killing poor Lappy with your enthusiasm!?” Amethyst spoke dramatically as she threw her arm around Lapis’ shoulders, rubbing her back gently as if Lapis were actually in pain.

A small smirk made its way onto Lapis’ lips as she started making pained choking noises, raising one arm shakily into the air to really play up the fact that she was suffering.

Pearl huffed indignantly and opened her mouth to retort, only for another voice to cut in before she could. “You guys are here cause I’m calling in a favor.”

Lifting her face from her arms Lapis watched as Jasper closed the distance between herself and their table, leaning over to give Pearl a quick kiss before taking a seat beside her. Lapis could feel herself gag a little at the display, sure she had more or less forgiven the larger girl and was happy enough that Jasper was in a better place in her life thanks to Pearl, but that didn’t mean she wanted to see it.

“Don’t make that face Lapis, I can give you a kiss too if you want?” Jasper asked with a shit-eating grin, only getting a fart noise for a response from the moody young women.

“Jasper I simply am dying to know.” Pearl practically whined, **_whined_** , in excitement overload. Lapis wanted to hate on her for that, but she supposed if she had been trying to get into a specific party her entire adult life and suddenly an invitation was dangled in front of her she would probably whine too.

The amazonian women simply laughed, ruffling Pearl hair lightly, as she pulled a small envelope out of her leather jacket. “I did, in fact, mange to make your dream come true doll.” Jasper spoke with pride lacing her voice, seemingly unphased when Pearl reached over and snatched the envelope from her grasp.

Pearl’s seat bounce only intensified when she looked in the envelope to find two tickets to the event and Lapis found that it was possible to become even more annoyed with the other girl than she already was.

“There is a bit of a catch though…” Jasper said almost sheepishly, with a tone Lapis was unaware that she could make, freezing Pearl in place. The ballerina’s face pulled into a confused pout and Lapis felt a genuine smile grace her lips for the first time since Pearl had pulled her out of her nice warm bedroom.

Maybe they would have to be wait staff for the party? Or maybe Jasper volunteered the two to be valets or the people who take coats? Regardless, Lapis was immensely happy that Pearl had finally stopped her wretched bouncing.

“The friend I got the tickets from has to go with us for us to get in…and since they are a social recluse and I’m just about the only person they know…” Jasper paused for a moment before turning towards Lapis and Amethyst. “They’re going to need a date…”

Oh, hell no. Lapis was not going on a blind date with Jasper’s super nerd friend! Especially not to such a boring ass party, on Christmas Eve no less!

“Fuck no Jazz, there is no way I am going out with your weirdo friend.” Amethyst said quickly, raising her arms up into an x. “Besides I’m spending Christmas with the ‘Famethyst’ this year so I won’t even be here.” The smallest girl leaned back in her chair and shot Lapis an apologetic look.

Which was unneeded as far as Lapis was concerned, because there was no way she was going to go either! Pearl could look at her with those hopeful puppy eyes all she wanted, it wouldn’t sway Lapis’ mind in the slightest!

In fact Lapis had just opened her mouth to tell them both off when her phone vibrated against her leg.

“I had planned for you to turn down the request runt…” Jasper said with a solemn voice as she locked gazes with Lapis, signaling to the blunette that the text she had just received was from her.

Lapis raised an eyebrow in skepticism at the larger women, unsure of what she could really say to change her mind, but Lapis decided to humor her and pulled out her phone to read her new text.

Lapis felt her face pale as she read Jasper’s message…then she felt her face begin to heat up in rage as she realized Jasper had planned on this happening.

“You’re a horrid monster! You promised you wouldn’t ever talk about that again!” Lapis screeched, preparing to pounce at Jasper from across the table, only to be placated by Amethyst resting a comforting hand on her shoulder and pulling her back down into her seat.

“I do what I must for love Lapis!” Jasper claimed boldly, clenching her hand into a tight fist and posing in what she must have thought was a noble fashion. Pearl blushed brightly at the comment, Lapis could only find it in herself to snort angrily while Amethyst whooped for her larger cousin.

“Fine I will go, but you will **_never_** bring it up again and so help me if you do I’m going to cut both your nipples off!” Lapis threatened with a primal growl, stabbing a nearby fork into the table, causing all three of the other girls to shiver in fear at what they knew was not an empty threat.

“G-good, then that solves everything! I’ll let them know and we will come get you two at five sharp on Christmas Eve for the party.” Jasper said with a nervous smile, stumbling over her words at first as her mind quickly relived some of the worst threats Lapis had made good on when they were still together.

“Great, wonderful…I’m going home now.” Lapis grumbled angrily as she stood to leave, not really in the mood now to sit and play nice with her manipulative ex and her fucking bumble ball of a girlfriend. “And stop bouncing its fucking annoying!”

Pearl froze again, having had regained her exuberance the moment Lapis agreed, to smile at Lapis with equal parts gratitude and fear. “Thank you so much for doing this Lapis, I’ll take you dress shopping tomorrow or the next day and you can get whatever you want on me.”

Lapis mumbled a half-hearted yeah as she wave goodbye to the three before exiting the café. It couldn’t be too bad right? She would just have to spend like three or four hours making small talk with a complete stranger…who was probably a gross sweaty nerd with no hopes of ever getting laid due to smelling like cooking oil and day old meat…

Who was she kidding? It was going to be awful.

Lapis sighed mournfully as she trudged her way through the snow, eyes locked to the ground as she walked. Never bothering to register the festive lights and decorations all around her or even react to the corner Santa who wished her a Merry Christmas…

She couldn’t top thinking about how she would end up being nothing more than arm jewelry for some creep to show off to his parents and their high class friends. Being forced to wear a stupid dress and stupid heels…

After walking for what felt like fifteen years Lapis finally looked up and was greeted with the sight of the Universe home all lit up with strands of multicolored lights. Large inflatables in the yard, window clingers on every visible pane of glass and even fake snowflakes hung from the porch roof…

Lapis might not be in love with the holidays like the other are, but she does enjoy being around her ‘surrogate family’ this time of year. It’s nice to be cared about… _truly_ cared about…and she was going to miss all of it now.

Rose’s Christmas Eve dinner, building the gingerbread house with Steven and playing all those weird holiday bored games with everyone ganging up on Greg…

Lapis was going to miss out on all the holiday fun so Pearl and Jasper could go kiss ass at some stupid party…and she was absolutely miserable about it…

“Amethyst texted and said you were heading back…” Rose’s voice suddenly cut through the frigid night air and Lapis wondered how long she had been staring blankly at the house. The happy memories of past few Christmas’ spent with the Universes were replaced with the anger and annoyance over her new ‘obligation’ for Christmas Eve.

“Yeah…” Lapis mumbled softly once she finally made it to the front door. The blunette didn’t want to deal with anyone at the moment so she tried to push past Rose so she could make a b-line for her room, only for the larger women to snag her with one arm and pull her towards the family room.

Lapis groaned as she was pulled onto the couch, then sighed as she was handed a cup of hot chocolate and finally began to tear up when Rose placed a cover over her shoulders. Sitting down beside the now weepy young women Rose smiled sympathetically as she pulled Lapis into a light hug.

“I’ve been given the story and me and Jasper will have a discussion the next time she is over.” Rose said simply, since she was a strong advocate of never forcing others into things they didn’t want to do. “Pearl will be getting a talking to as well, she should have stuck up for you and not let Jasper bully you.”

Lapis could hear the disapproval in Rose’s tone. Pearl, Garnet and Amethyst had grown up in her care and she prided herself on how well she had raised them, having Pearl throw Lapis under the bus for her own gain must have really disappointed Rose.

“You should give her a spanking too.” Lapis laughed, although it sounded fairly watery and slightly broken due to her tears.

“I just might.” A small teasing smile made its way onto Rose’s face and Lapis could only laugh a little harder. Sure they were all in their early to middle twenties, except for Steven of course, but that didn’t stop Rose from mommy-ing them and Lapis could honestly see Rose still handing out spankings if they were truly warranted.

It took a few moments for Lapis’ watery laughter to stop and when it finally did she took a shaky breath to steady her voice before she went about starting the topic of discussion she knew Rose was waiting for.

“I don’t mind helping them out and I don’t really mind going on a blind date…I…just am really gonna miss our Christmas Eve traditions you know? I never really did family stuff back in Hawaii and I have just grown so used to you guys and all your crazy holiday stuff and-” Lapis’ rambling was cut short by a small hiccup followed by a fresh stream of tears.

Lapis cursed herself for that, why was she always so weepy when it came to moments like this? It had to be more of Rose’s evil magic…

Rose nodded along with what lapis was saying, pulling the younger women into a tighter hug before rocking them back and forth to help Lapis calm down. “I know sweetie and I’m sorry they forced you into agreeing. I tell you what, we won’t open the Christmas Eve gifts until Christmas morning and I’ll make sure to save you a nice big plateful of your favorites from dinner.”

A soft hum of appreciation slipped past Lapis’ lips as she snuggled deeper into Rose’s arms, feeling tired after her walk out in the snow and then crying for the past few minutes.

“We will go dress shopping tomorrow, that way I can make sure you don’t pick on Pearl no matter how deserving it may be, and we will find you the most beautiful dress available so you can knock whoever this blind date is off their feet!” Rose’s smile seemed to leak into her voice as she nudged Lapis in the side, getting a peal of giggles to escape Lapis’ lips.

Silence descended on the two for a moment before Lapis jumped from the couch and offered a chaste ‘thanks Rose’ before bolting off to her room to save herself the embarrassment of falling asleep right there on the couch. Rose simply shook her head, a smile lingering on her face as she carried the now empty mug into the kitchen.

Lapis smiled fondly at the small felt Christmas scenes covering her door as she slipped into her room to flop down on her bed. “Christmas dress shopping huh? It’s been a while since I last wore a dress…” Lapis thought with a small smile, a little excited at the prospect of showing off a little…even if it was for a gross sweaty nerd and a bunch of stuffy business moguls… 

Their goal was to find the most beautiful and flattering dress they could and Lapis had to admit she absolutely loved what they eventually came away with.

It was a stunning shade of cerulean blue, looking almost cobalt under certain lights, with a black sash around the middle tied in a loose bow in the back. Small black diamonds densely covered the bottom hem of the dress, gradually fading out the higher on the dress they went until they vanished completely around the knees.

The dressed ended mid-calf on Lapis although the split on the right side of the dress came to her mid-thigh. Rose almost vetoed the dress due to the split and it being a bit more low cut then she would have liked Lapis to wear, but Lapis loved the way it fit and how undeniably good she looked in it so Rose eventually caved and let her get it.

They checked out a few more stores for accessory’s which netted Lapis a small lacy choker and a pair of elbow length black gloves.

Lapis felt like a movie star and nearly refused to take the outfit off after putting it back on to show Amethyst and Steven once they finally got back home. That was until Jasper walked into the room and made a snarky comment about how she would tell her friend to wear purple so the two could look like a big bruise together.

Just like that all of Lapis’ good will towards the night and her outfit was gone and even after a few days had passed and Lapis finally got to wear her outfit once again she still couldn’t get rid of her annoyance and general distain for the upcoming party that evening.

“Come now Lapis sit up, if you slouch like that you’ll wrinkle your dress.” Pearl chided as she placed her hands under Lapis’ arms and pulled her into an upright position.

If anything good had come from the situation, other than Lapis getting a fancy new dress, it was how Pearl had dialed back from how heavy handed she normally was with her ‘mothering’ of Lapis. Rose was to thank for that and Lapis made sure to over exaggerate her appreciation anytime Rose and Pearl were in the same room, much to Pearl’s chagrin.

“It won’t be as bad as you think Lapis.” Garnet offered calmly from where she sat on the couch, watching with a barely concealed smirk as Lapis slouched back into the chair and Pearl pulled her back into an actual sitting position.

“You don’t have to hang out with someone who smells like ham all night…” Lapis mumbled under her breath, folding her arms across her chest.

Lapis had been dreading the Diamond Banquet all day in spite of everyone reassuring her that everything would turn out alright, with Greg going as far as to offer her a ride home if things went downhill while at the party.

Pearl was about to chide Lapis again for sitting with bad posture before she was cut off by the sound of the front door opening and the middle of what Lapis could only guess was a fairly heated debate.

“…yeah I understand I owe you for that as well, I’ll make good on it I swear.” Jasper’s voice drifted in from the front followed by the sound of footsteps as her and her friend made their way towards the living room.

“You say things like that all the time! I don’t believe you for even a second Jasper.” A somewhat nasally voice replied and Lapis felt her lips twitch upward at the snarky tone that voice had addressed Jasper with.

Jasper turned the corner and walked into the room wearing a rather traditional tux, which matched Pearl’s traditional cream dress rather well…although Lapis would never admit that out loud. After shooting Jasper an unamused glare Lapis let her eyes drift towards the apparent ‘friend’ and had to hold back a gasp of surprise at what she saw.

There standing next to Jasper was one of the most gorgeous women Lapis had ever seen. Standing a mere five feet and two inches tall compared to Lapis’ own five foot eleven and looking positively tiny compared to Jasper’s monstrous six foot eight inches.

Her hair was a bright sunny blonde, a stark contrast to Jasper’s platinum shade, kept in the perfect storm between fashionably styled and crazily unkempt. Not to mention how well it framed her adorable face, which was currently scrunched up in the most hilariously cute manner.

If she had been going for the frighteningly angry look then she was failing miserably.

The cerulean button up dress shirt and black vest she wore over the top half of her body did more than Lapis would have liked to hide her figure. Lapis could easily see she wasn’t as well-endowed as Jasper or Garnet, not that Lapis could really judge, but the blunette suspected a perky pair of B cups were hidden away behind her formal attire.

Which Lapis immediately loved. Not only did their colors match, but the way the blonde held herself in those clothes made Lapis a little weak in the knees.

A regular pair of black dress slacks and dress shoes completed her ensemble. Lapis found her mouth feeling uncomfortably dry and yet seemed to have an excess of saliva she needed to swallow upon noticing how filled out the smaller woman’s slacks were.

The smaller women had hips and thighs to die for and, Lapis could only assume since asking this stranger to turn around and bend over was out of the question, the best ass in Beach City.

To top it all off, as if she hadn’t made the absolute best impression on Lapis just by walking into the room, she was wearing the most adorably dorky black bowtie and had the cutest tinted glasses resting on her little button nose.

“You really must be a nerd if you tint your actual prescription.” Lapis found herself speaking in spite of herself, feeling some odd sense of pride as the women immediately dropped her discussion with Jasper in favor of averting her attention towards the blunette.

“I spend quite a bit of time looking at computer screens.” The woman spoke with a small huff, her voice endearingly nasally Lapis decided, not so much to defend herself but more to simply give the reason as to why her glasses were tinted.

Which Lapis could understand, after all Steven had gifted her a pair of tinted glasses a few months ago when her and Amethyst got really into one of him and Connie’s video game franchises and wouldn’t stop playing them. Without those glasses Lapis just knew she would have suffered far more headaches then she even wanted to think about.

That didn’t mean Lapis wasn’t going to tease her about them though…

“Lapis this is your date for the evening, Peridot-” Jasper’s little introduction was cut short as Lapis abruptly stood and sashayed her way over to where the two of them were standing and boldly rested her arms on Peridot’s shoulders, crossing her wrists behind the shorter girl’s head.

“When Jasper said you were a social recluse and a super nerd I was fully expecting a three hundred pound blob monster, I am delightfully surprised that you turned out to an adorably tiny gremlin instead.” Lapis teased, locking eyes with the shorter woman as she talked.

Not many people chose to hold her gaze, even when she was in a good mood, so she was delightfully surprised when Peridot refused to avert her eyes once they had been stolen by Lapis’ own. This woman seemed to command respect despite her short stature…maybe that was why Lapis found teasing her absolutely irresistible.

“I’m also pleasantly surprised, when Jasper said my date was with the ‘water witch’ I was expecting someone a horribly pointed face. Yours is at least somewhat aesthetically pleasing.” Peridot said with a straight face, still looking into Lapis’ eyes.

Had anyone else said that to her Lapis would have most likely felt offended, but she only felt amusement bubble up in her chest along with a strange warmth. Why? Because for all of the three minutes Lapis had known her Peridot had presented herself as no-nonsense and yet here she was biting back in playful banter.

Lapis was absolutely loving it.

Plus it didn’t help Peridot’s case that she flushed a soft pink after she finished speaking, leaving Lapis to grin devilishly at the unsaid compliment about her appearance.

“Well I’m happy I pass some of your standards, had I known I was going to be attending the party with such a stud I would have chosen to wear something far more flattering.” Lapis’ voice held strong to its teasing lilt, but the tone she used was one of mock innocence as she used her vantage point from behind Peridot’s head to tilt the smaller woman’s gaze down so she was now staring at Lapis’ chest rather than her eyes.

Peridot’s gaze lingered for a few seconds before her head snapped up, the soft pink flush on her cheeks having grown in intensity to a full on blush, as she cleared her throat. Lapis could see the cogs turning in the nerds head for a way to flip the scales on her and she was equal parts excited to see what Peridot would do next and convinced that whatever it was wouldn’t be enough to unseat Lapis’ dominance.

Sadly their moment was interrupted by Jasper groaning loudly from the couch which she had at some point moved too while Lapis was rightfully distracted.

“Stop being fucking gross and let’s go, Pearlie wants to get there a little early.” Jasper huffed as she heaved herself off the couch and made her way towards the door with Pearl excitedly following after her.

“You have no right to say anything about being gross with how you act at work anytime ‘Pearlie’ happens to cross your mind.” Peridot huffed as she reached behind her head and gently pulled Lapis’ hands apart so she could back out of her grasp, only releasing the blunette’s limbs after placing a soft kiss to her left hand.

Lapis felt her breath hitch for a moment, only to come off the millisecond high by the sight of Peridot’s devious little grin. Lapis felt her lips pull up into a bemused smile, despite the heat rushing to her face.

“Shall we go then?” Peridot asked with a small bow before offering her arm to Lapis, which the taller girl gracefully took. Lapis caught Garnet’s amused grin and thumbs up right as the two were walking out the front door, flashing the diva a thumbs up of her own as she shut the door behind them.

The two walked side by side until they reached Jasper’s car, Lapis’ smile only gaining strength when Peridot pulled away from her grasp to open the door for her.

Peridot’s face flushed lightly once again as Lapis whispered ‘such a gentleman’ with a soft giggle as she slid into her seat. The blonde found herself taking a deep steadying breath once she shut the door before she made her way around the car to her side.

“Now I don’t want to see you two getting handsy back there, last thing I need is Dot refusing to go in cause of a wet spot on her pants.” Jasper chuckled while starting up the car as the other three passengers faces colored to varying degrees. Lapis might have yelled at her ex for being so vulgar if Peridot’s face hadn’t turned the lovely shade of scarlet that it had.

Lapis wanted to be the next cause of that enticing blush.

“You are unbearable, I shouldn’t have agreed to this after all.” Peridot huffed angrily as she turned her face to stare out her window, trying to will the heat from her cheeks.

“Aw, don’t say that Dottie…you’ll make me sad…” Lapis took the chance to whisper her last few words directly into Peridot’s ear, enjoying the visible shiver she got in response. After waiting a few moments for a response and not getting one Lapis wordlessly rested her head on Peridot’s shoulder, enjoying the sense of comfort radiating off the smaller girl.

To Lapis’ surprise she suddenly felt Peridot’s small soft hand slowly ease its way into her grasp, before she laced their fingers together and gave her hand a small squeeze. “I suppose meeting the ‘water witch’ and surviving to tell the tale is an acceptable reward for tonight.”

A small breathy chuckle escaped Lapis’ lips as she pulled Peridot a little closer to her and snuggled deeper into the small blondes shoulder. “We still have all night ahead of us Dottie…let’s see if you really can ‘survive’ me…”

It was with those whispered words that all conversation in the car ended into a comfortable, if not slightly tense, silence. Jasper tolerated the silence a few minutes before turning on the radio, finding a station playing soft Christmas songs and turning the volume down to keep the calm ambiance that had overtaken the quartet.

The drive ended far too quickly in Lapis’ opinion, having wanted to cuddle into Peridot for longer, but sadly Peridot nudged her away as soon as they pulled up to the valet and slid out of the car. With a small frown Lapis followed suit and after Jasper handed off her keys the four made their way into the building together, with Peridot leading the way since she was the only one who knew exactly where the banquet was being held.

Lapis was in awe as they walked through one ornate hallway after another, it being plainly obvious that this building was built and maintained with money and lots of it. However the hallways were tacky in comparison to the grand ballroom.

The ballroom was absolutely massive, which Lapis figured made sense given how many people attended these banquets, but she was still blown away by its sheer size and grandeur. Looking to her left she found several tables with beautifully displayed dishes, mostly Christmas favorites such as ham and goose although some dishes appeared to be things like fried chicken and small finger sandwiches.

Beside those tables were what Lapis assumed was the drink stands, if the large ice sculptures were anything to go off of. On the opposite side of the room was a large glass wall with intermittent doors leading out to the garden terrace. The terrace itself was lined with Christmas trees, each brightly decorated with lights and garland.

Garland and tinsel also hung from the walls and down from the ceiling, making the whole room sparkle and shine. With a small band at the back of the room playing a soft jazzy rendition of Jingle Bell Rock, which Lapis actually found rather pleasing to listen too.

Had that been all Lapis could have easily lost herself to enjoyment for the evening, but sadly the main draw of this particular party was schmoozing with the rest of the ‘high class’ and even though they were a bit early there was already a good amount of people milling about making small talk.

It was quite disgusting in Lapis’ opinion. While she had never been as good at reading people as Garnet was she could at least see that none of the people walking around chatting was doing it to have a good time.

No, this was strictly business and Lapis found herself hating it immensely…she bit her tongue though, she really didn’t need to offend any of the people here and give Pearl an uphill battle to climb. Besides who knows how Peridot would react to her-

“Disgusting nightmare like always.” Peridot said with a small snarl to her lips as she checked the four of them in with the nearby doorman.

Lapis felt her heart flutter at the blonde’s choice of words to describe the event before them, but before the blunette could retort Jasper grasped Pearl’s hand and pushed past the two. “You two lovebirds have an enjoyable evening.” Jasper ended her tease with a wink before she and Pearl were swallowed up by the crow in the middle of the room.

“Disgusting nightmare like always.” Lapis said with a melodramatic sigh as she glanced over at Peridot with a sly smile, her heart fluttering once again as she caught the smaller women trying to stifle a laugh with the back of her hand.

“Yes she is, come on the best spot to stand is over by the food.” Peridot said mirthfully as she laced her fingers with Lapis’ again and began leading her over to the left side of the room. A few people tried to get Peridot’s attention, but the shorter women simply ignored them and continued leading Lapis to a small spot between the food tables and the drink station.

Peridot simply released her hold on Lapis’ hand and looked up at her for a moment, an unsaid request for Lapis to stay put, before she turned and made her way over to one of the drink stations.

Lapis didn’t have a good view of her from where she stood so instead she turned her gaze back out to the party, rolling her eyes every time she caught a fake smile or a forced holiday greeting.

“I hope you like eggnog because there isn’t really anything else ‘festive’ over there and I must say this whole shit show just gets me right into the Christmas spirit.” Peridot’s voice broke Lapis out of her revere and as she glanced down at her date to take her drink she found a genuinely happy smile adorning her lips.

“Hmm, well it’s not the best thing in the world…but I suppose it will do.” Lapis hummed, feeling a small genuine smile start to creep onto her own lips. That was until she caught sight of Peridot pulling a small silver container out of her pocket and her expression changed to one of bemused shock. “Although it would be a whole hell of a lot better with that in it! Is that a flask of whisky!?”

Lapis wasn’t sure if she should be dumbfounded that the nerd smuggled in booze or extremely impressed. Judging from the cheeky grin that formed on Peridot’s lips Lapis supposed the latter.

“Scotch actually, since they insist on having no alcohol readily available at these god forsaken parties I have learned to improvise.” The smugness Peridot radiated as she spoke was almost palpable, but Lapis couldn’t help feeling a bit of second hand pride for the smaller women. A feeling of extreme gratefulness quickly overtook that feeling however as Peridot poured some of the scotch into her glass.

“You know, the way Jasper made you out to be a boring reclusive weirdo did not give your feisty ass justice.” Lapis mused, turning her attention back towards the room as she leaned against the wall and sipped at her drink. She had been right, the scotch greatly improved it.

Peridot chuckled softly and Lapis could tell even without looking the shorter blonde had a light pink flush on her cheeks. “Yes well, I can attest that I’m not the most sociable person, but that doesn’t mean I am the trope shut-in so see on TV or anything.”

Silence overtook them for a few moments as Lapis had nothing pressing to say and simply enjoyed being in the other girl’s presence. Hearing movement Lapis was about to turn her head when she felt Peridot lean back against the wall next to her.

“You are also quite a bit different then Jasper led me to believe.” Peridot muttered softly, almost as if she hadn’t wanted Lapis to catch what she had said.

However, her words had certainly peaked the blunette’s interest. Lapis hadn’t really considered that Jasper would talk about her the same way to Peridot as she had when describing the smaller girl to Lapis. Now she was curious, what had her ex become…friend (?)...said about her to Peridot?

“Oh yeah? What did miss bonehead say about me?” Lapis asked with genuine curiosity slipping into her voice, despite her best efforts to only sound casually interested, as she turned her gaze to look at Peridot.

Peridot simply kept looking out at the room, clutching her glass in one hand with the other placed behind her back as she braced against the wall. The smaller girl’s expression was unreadable, the closest thing Lapis could use to describe the face Peridot was making was the face of a loved one forced to confront someone they cared for and knew if they didn’t choose their words carefully they could potentially lose them forever…

Not super reassuring…

Luckily Peridot didn’t leave Lapis to overthink her quickly growing storm of thoughts, because after another brief moment Peridot brought her glass to her lips, taking a small drink before finally speaking up. “Your nickname is the water-witch remember? I’ve been friends with Jasper for a long time…”

Lapis felt her heart start to beat a bit faster since she knew what Peridot was hinting at. Jasper had obviously told the smaller women about the fights they had gotten into when they were still together…

How much had Jasper told her? Whatever she said she most likely spun the story in her favor…not like it mattered, Lapis had been just as awful as Jasper had been…So much for any future relationship with this beautiful little nerd, friendship or otherwise, since she apparently knew just how awful Lapis was…

“I thought Jasper was just being an ass at first, then I assumed you both were being asses…” Peridot laughed lightly, taking another sip from her drink. “Now I can see it really was just her being an ass.”

Lapis felt her heart catch in her chest as she stared in utter confusion at the smaller girl. How could she say something like that? Lapis had been awful to Jasper! She enjoyed making Jasper suffer, sure it was because Jasper was just as awful to her, but still that didn’t excuse her from all the misdeeds she had done!

Peridot finally turned her gaze to look at Lapis, to see the storm of emotions raging in the blunette’s striking blue eyes. Peridot watched the taller girl open and close her mouth several times, struggling to find what to say to deny Peridot’s assertion, but after a few moments of Lapis finding herself unable to retort Peridot spoke up once again.

“You are too hard on yourself Lapis. You had some issues, hell maybe you still do…but if Jasper wasn’t willing to help you through them, which she couldn’t do since she had issues herself, she had no right forcing you two to stay together.” Peridot spoke softly, gingerly taking Lapis’ free hand in her own.

Lapis’ mind was an absolute mess how could this girl be saying things like this to her? How could she say things like that with such sincerity? How could she look at Lapis with such a supportive smile?

“I take it Jasper blackmailed you into coming with me tonight? I’ll give you a bit of ammunition to fire back next time, I got Jasper her job and I can easily take it away so I demanded she break it off with you since you two were doing nothing but hurting each other.” Peridot’s mouth curled up into a devilish grin as she shared Jaspers biggest weakness with Lapis.

It was almost too much to process. Peridot had been her savior, Lapis remembered the day Jasper came home and kicked her out of their shitty little apartment. It had hurt at first, but the longer she was out of the relationship the better she got. Of course living with Rose and Steven had helped, but the fact that she was finally out of Jasper’s grasp...

Lapis giggled airily as she scooped Peridot into a tight hug, feeling her heart flutter at the small squeak of surprise the smaller women emitted. Lapis would need a bit of time to process everything Peridot had said, but right then she just wanted to be happy…and happiness to her right now was Peridot.

“You are just too pure for your own good.” Lapis whispered into Peridot’s ear before pulling back and kissing her lightly on the cheek. Pleased beyond words at the sight of Peridot standing their dumbstruck with a blinding scarlet blush on her face.

Lapis

The next couple of hours passed with quite a bit of laughter and halfhearted ribbing of each other and the other party goers. Lapis had fully relaxed and Peridot had finally fought off her blush, despite Lapis doing her best to keep it a permanent feature on her face.

Peridot had just made a rather crude joke about one of the stuffy old men standing at the far end of the room, making Lapis snort lightly, when she suddenly shot straight up off the wall. Lapis was about to question the blonde on what was the matter when the sound of clicking heels drew her attention.

Turning to look at the person coming closer Lapis was surprised to see none other than the Yellow Diamond heading in their direction. Lapis pushed off the wall as well, standing up straight next to Peridot unsure why one of the most powerful people on this coast would be coming over to talk with them.

“I knew I would find you here, still not one to socialize with my associates are you Peridot?” Yellow Diamond said with a small smirk coming to a stop a few feet from the pair, her gaze very obviously scrutinizing both girl’s choice of evening wear.

“You are lucky I am here at all if not for Jasper-” Peridot spoke up with a bit of a stammer to her voice, but she was quickly waved off by the much taller and much more intimidating women.

“Yes I am aware, I was surprised by her request which is why I made the stipulations I did. Regardless, it is improper to not introduce your date for the evening.” Yellow Diamond’s gaze shifted from their outfits, Lapis could only assumed they both passed, to Lapis’ own holding the blunette’s eyes with much more power than Peridot had earlier that night.

“Lapis this is Yvette Diamond…my mother...mom this is Lapis Lazuli.” Peridot said with an embarrassed blush as she gestured back and forth between the two.

_“Well that would explain a lot actually.”_ Lapis thought as she swallowed down her nerves and brought a cheeky smile to her lips. “Hello Lady Diamond, this has been an absolutely lovely banquet. Peridot has been a lovely date thus far, although she had not mentioned that you two were related. I do hope we will be seeing a bit more of each other.”

Peridot’s jaw comically dropped as she looked at Lapis as if she were some sort of space alien. Yvette’s mouth simply curved up into an amused grin, taking a liking to Lapis’ confident manner even if she could sense it was all just a show and Lapis was actually extremely frightened of her.

That was exactly how she liked to be addressed: With confidence and underlying fear.

“I must say I am simply charmed, Peridot I will be greatly disappointed if you let this fine young women slip through your fingers.” Yvette crossed her arms over her chest and brought one hand to rest on her chin. “In fact I would like to see her again at our New Year’s Banquet so that we will have some more time to talk.”

Peridot made a few sputtering noises as she looked frantically back and forth between Lapis and her mother, trying to piece together what exactly was happening. Lapis however felt like she was in the zone and decided to carry on with her faux confidence.

“It would be an honor to be allowed to escort Dottie to another one of your banquets.” Lapis felt a real smirk trying to slip onto her face as she casually used the nickname she had been teasing Peridot with all night.

“Well that is wonderful to hear, I simply cannot wait to hear all about you Miss Lazuli. However, I am very busy tonight so I must cut our conversation short.” Yvette glanced over her shoulder, spying at least nine people preparing to assault her with conversations after she was finally finished speaking to her daughter. “Peridot.”

The commanding tone caused Peridot’s confused squawking to cease as she snapped to attention once again. “Yes mom?” Peridot asked, confusion dripping from her voice as her mind had still not made any sense out of what had been happening.

“I will dismiss you two for the evening since I can count on your attendance on New Year’s Eve. Feel free to use my car, in fact I’ll let my driver know that you two will be out shortly.” Yvette all but commanded this and Peridot could only nod. Despite all the conflicting emotions Lapis herself was feeling she had to admit an obedient Peridot was also quite cute.

Suddenly Lapis was frozen as the older women quickly, much too quickly, leaned in close and whispered directly into Lapis’ ear. “If she can look me in the eyes when I see her with you on New Year’s Eve I’ll know you failed…and I won’t let my daughter date a failure.”

Lapis felt like she might just die…

“Alright you two go get your coats and be off and yes, I will make sure to speak with Jasper and her date on your behalf. Now step to it.” And with those parting words she was gone, leaving both Peridot and Lapis stunned speechless.

Peridot was understandably the first of the two to begin regaining her composer. Since neither of them seemed ready to begin talking again just yet Peridot once again interlaced her fingers with Lapis’ and began gently tugging her towards the front where they had been dropped off.

The two walked through the ornate hallways in silence until Lapis finally snapped out of her stupor and dumbly said the first thing that was clear in her mind. “So your last name is Diamond huh?”

Peridot stopped them in the middle of one of the hallways to look up at Lapis, their eyes locking for a moment before the two broke out into laughter.

“I am happy to see that your deductive reasoning is as sharp as ever Lazuli, yes my last name is Diamond.” Peridot said in between unstoppable mirthful laughs, the whole situation seeming absolutely ridiculous to her all of a sudden.

“Hey how was I supposed to know? It’s not like you got your moms height genes.” Lapis teased, sticking her tongue out and blowing a raspberry at the smaller women before laughing with her once again.

The two continued laughing and teasing each other until they reached the main entrance, although it had mostly died down to sporadic giggling by that point. There sitting right outside was a sleek black limousine and Lapis did her best to feel surprised, but in the end she couldn’t help but feel like she was sort of expecting it.

Once the two were inside and the car purred to life Peridot took a deep breath to banish any remaining giggles trapped inside her chest. “Well thank you Lazuli that was by far the most enjoyable Diamond Banquet I have ever been too, let’s get you home so you can salvage at least some of your Christmas Eve.”

Lapis felt the warmth in her chest fall along with her smile at the implication that the two would be parting ways so soon. Lapis thought back on the night…their meeting, their banter, the kindness Peridot exuded and how comfortable Lapis felt just being herself around her…people claimed that the true feeling of Christmas was the warmth of family…of home…

For some reason Lapis didn’t want to try and explain Peridot felt just as much like home as Steven and Rose did…maybe even more…

“Or…we could go back to your place and talk some more? Drink some hot chocolate and maybe watch a crappy movie together?” Lapis ventured uncertainly, she knew without a shadow of a doubt she didn’t want to leave Peridot’s side just yet, but she wasn’t so sure the smaller women felt the same way. Sure they had held hands and Peridot let Lapis lay on her shoulder, but maybe she was just okay with touching…

“Don’t you have family stuff you want to do? Jasper says Pearl’s household is super big into Christmas and stuff- Not that I don’t want to have you over, I just don’t want to pull you away from something important or anything!” Peridot rambled, waving her hands back and forth.

Lapis felt her smile returning as she watched Peridot flail about for a few moments before cutting her off to reassure her. “No, Steven has already built the gingerbread house by this point and they have most likely started the games already, besides once Pearl gets back there with Jasper she will most likely insist on watching some crappy old Christmas movie after talking at length about the party.”

Peridot scrunched her face up in confusion for a moment before asking in an inquisitive tone. “Would that Steven be Steven Universe by any chance?”

Now it was Lapis’ turn to scrunch her face up in confusion, wondering how the hell Peridot knew Steven.

“That’s right, how did you know?” Lapis asked, mimicking Peridot’s inquisitive tone. Getting one of her signature raspberries in return, causing them both to begin laughing again.

“I see him at the library all the time, me him and his friend Connie have a pseudo book club thing going on.” Peridot explained, leaning back in the seat with one last small chuckle. “Small world.”

Lapis had to agree and after a moment of thinking about it she had the most wonderful idea. “You should come for Christmas tomorrow! Steven would be so excited!” Lapis decided to leave out the part about how happy **_she_** would be to have Peridot there.

“I cannot crash their family Christmas, besides I wouldn’t have a ride over there anyway.” Peridot spoke with a small nervous laugh as she rubbed the back of her head sheepishly. Lapis was about to press her on the subject, really liking the idea of spending Christmas with Peridot, when the limousine came to a stop.

“Don’t you worry about a thing Miss Peridot, I’ll let your mother know and will be here bright and early to pick you two up. Now off you go, not good to keep your mom waiting.” The drive said with a large grin, ushering them off with a couple flicks of his hand.

The idea of making Yvette wait for her own car caused the two to practically leap from the car, it wasn’t until Peridot shut the door and the limousine pulled back out onto the road that Peridot realized that she had been played.

“Mom won’t even been done for another hour at the least.” Peridot groaned, rubbing the bridge of her nose as she turned to lead the way into the large building.

Lapis was impressed, although not surprised, with how nice Peridot apartment building was and even more so with her actual penthouse apartment. It was large and spacious, although it was decorated very minimalistically.

Not much in the way of color or decorations could be found, just a plain white furniture set in the lounge area and stainless steel appliances in the kitchen. Lapis couldn’t help but feel like Peridot was wasting this places potential, already coming up with ideas for how to bring some color and excitement to the place.

“Sorry it’s a little sparse in here, I didn’t really decorate much…” Peridot muttered, fading off at the end of what she was saying as she gestured to the large white sofa and quickly made her way into the kitchen, presumably to make the two some drinks.

Once Lapis sat on the sofa the realization that the driver had stranded her here for the night finally dawned on her. No wonder the nerd was so flustered and shy, that thought brought a devious smile to Lapis’ lips although she quenched it after a few moments. The last thing she wanted to do was scare the smaller women away with being to forward.

_“If she can look me in the eyes the next time I see her with you I’ll know you failed…and I won’t let my daughter date a failure.”_

Then again…

 “I’m sorry about you being stuck here Lapis, I can call Jasper and tell her to swing by and pick you up on her way back with Pearl.” Peridot’s voice held a tense edge although her body seemed more or less relaxed as she handed a small cup of hot chocolate to Lapis before taking a seat on the far end of the sofa.

“No, I…want to stay here with you, if that’s not too forward.” Lapis bit her lower lip nervously after her heart took control of her lips away from her brain. The two had only known each other for only a few hours, of course she was being to forward! Lapis just couldn’t help but feel immensely sad whenever she thought about leaving Peridot’s side…

Peridot flushed and turned to look out the sliding glass door leading to what Lapis assumed was a veranda. “It’s not too forward…but why, I just- I don’t get it, I feel…” Peridot muttered angrily to herself and Lapis felt a soft smile creep onto her lips, fully amused that Peridot was getting upset at not fully understanding her emotions.

“You feel it too then? The sense of comfort between us…” Lapis said with a voice barely above a whisper as she slid closer to the smaller women and bumped their shoulders together.

Peridot finally turned her head to look into Lapis’ eyes, their faces only a few inches apart. “I’ve never felt this way before…uncontrollable urges to hold your hand…to see you smile and hear you laugh…it’s not normal…”

Their breathing was getting heavier and Lapis could feel her face heating up just as much as Peridot’s was. Bringing their lips a little closer Lapis uttered a wordless question to which Peridot answered by closing the rest of the distance between them.

Peridot’s lips were nothing like Jaspers. The kisses with her ex had been harsh and rough, filled with angry and hatful emotions…but Peridot’s lips were plush and soft, their kiss was so gentle and filled with so many emotions that Lapis doubted she could name them all, but she wanted every single one regardless.

The smaller women’s hair was so soft despite the small traces of hair gel Lapis could feel and the way she so needily pulled herself into Lapis’ lap made the blunette smile happily into their kiss.

A kiss that ended far too quickly for Lapis’ liking, but she had a feeling there would be more kisses to come if the look on Peridot’s face was anything to go by. “I never thought I would get a girlfriend for Christmas, thanks for coming in clutch Santa…” Peridot muttered dreamily, a cheeky little grin on her lips.

Lapis couldn’t stop the laughter that bubbled up out of her chest as she pulled Peridot into a tight hug and placed several small kisses all over her face. “A little nerd of my very own, best Christmas ever! I can’t wait to show Steve!”

“Lapis! I’m not crashing his family Christmas! Besides I grew up the child to the Yellow Diamond, I have no idea how to do a ‘family Christmas’.” Peridot said through a fountain of giggles as she tried to push Lapis away from her, despite making no real effort to leave the blunette’s lap.

“Even more reason for you to come! You cannot deny me, I will have my way!” Lapis spoke with determination as she redoubled her efforts in assaulting Peridot’s face with kisses, throwing in a few raspberries when she could.

Peridot was a laughing mess, shrieking every time Lapis blew a raspberry against her cheek. “Fine you win! You are awful, tormenting your girlfriend into meeting your family not two minutes after getting her.” Peridot huffed with as much annoyance as she could muster, which was practically none.

“Oh come off it Dottie, you love Steven just as much as I do! I know it because nobody can love that little ball of sunshine any less, it’s just not possible.” Lapis gave an over exaggerated eye roll, finally stopping her assault and settled for resting her hands on Peridot’s hips lovingly.

“That may be true, but it is still weird to just show up to his family Christmas…” Peridot sighed softly as she rested her hands on Lapis’ shoulders, the two looking at each other warmly before Peridot’s face scrunched up a little. “It’s weird…we’re weird because of this…right? I mean, it’s defiantly not normal for us to be, you know, like this so soon…right?”

Lapis had to agree their relationship wasn’t like any other he had ever known about, but was it a bad thing? She didn’t think so and she doubted Peridot did, but it would seem the smaller women needed a little convincing…

“Sure, it might be a bit weird to go from being strangers to girlfriends in just a few hours, but I’m certain there are even weirder scenarios…besides its Christmas, we can just call it a holiday miracle.” Lapis smiled softly as she spoke, loving the light happy feeling that filled her chest.

“A miracle huh? Okay, fine you win miss miracle…but I want some more solid proof that you are real and not some Christmas angel who will vanish once the holidays are over…” With those words Peridot leaned in and captured Lapis’ lips once again, much to the blunette’s delight.

Jasper called Peridot wondering what had happened with her mom and why Yvette looked so pleased…

Pearl called Lapis wondering where she was and if she needed a ride…

Rose shared a knowing smile with Garnet when Pearl and Jasper came home without them…

Snow slowly drifted from the sky to blanket Beach City…

Carolers sang beloved Christmas songs on the street below…

Lapis and Peridot didn’t hear or see any of it…they had all the time in the world to get to know each other, to learn about their pasts and what they wanted from the future. Their likes and dislikes, how the other truly worked when compared to themselves…but for now all they wanted was to be lost in the warmth of the other…

A soft kiss ended and before the next could begin, with a soft breathy voice, both Lapis and Peridot muttered…

“Merry Christmas…”

_**The End** _

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry this is so late...I have never done holiday or special week stories for any fandom before and I had really wanted to do a Christmas One-Shot for these two, but then the story started getting unruly. At first I felt as if there wasn't enough backstory, then there was too much...then I started second guessing how much of a focus I was putting on the holiday aspect of the story, which then flipped to me thinking there wasn't enough of it here to justify it being a Christmas story...I really wanted it to be a small One-Shot and for it to be posted before the new year, so there are probably some places that feel a bit off to read since I had to make concessions so the story didn't end up being twenty thousand words...I'm more or less happy with the final product, but I just feel like I could have done better...so to anyone who made it through that beast of a story and then took the time to read this rambling mess... 
> 
> Thank you and I hope you at least enjoyed the story a little bit. 
> 
> While it might be a bit late: Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays and I hope you all have a wonderful New Year


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